How are you showing up?
I recently attended a three-day conference where there was a broad mix of presenters and topics. I went along with a friend, excited to be there, met some fascinating people and was just delighted to be learning. At the end of the event, my friend made a passing comment about how she noticed I didn’t always appear engaged, and then carried on her conversation.
Wait a minute. What? Go back. What was that? Don’t worry about it, she said, it’s fine, it was probably just me.
But was it? I know that I wasn’t as interested in some topics as others, but is this how I ‘showed up’?
And does it matter? I believe it does, it matters a lot.
In his book The Third Space, Dr Adam Fraser shares that how we ‘show up’ (emotional state, your mindset and your behaviour) affects the people around us. Our moods are contagious, and this is why it matters. Have you walked into a room and felt the tension? Attended a birthday party and felt the joy and love?
Had my apparent disinterest affected the mood of other attendees? It had been observed, clearly, but had it negatively impacted others? I hope not!
Emotional Agility by Dr Susan David describes showing up as ‘acknowledging our thoughts without ever having to believe they are literally true’. We have the ability to adapt how we show up through being conscious of our emotional state.
The crazy thing is that I loved the conference, every minute of it. Being in a reflective state for some topics meant at times I showed up as disinterested. I know I can’t always be held responsible for how others see me, but I can build my awareness of how I’m perceived and the impact that is having.
How does this translate to the workplace? How do you affect the mood of your team, not just as a leader? How self-aware are you? How do you ‘show up’?
